Inspired to Succeed:.
Copyright © 2008 Dr. Stacia Pierce
Published by Life House Press at Smashwords
3000 W. Miller Rd. Lansing, MI 48911
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Inspired to Succeed is dedicated:
to my loving family, who provides me with inspiration daily and makes success so worthwhile;
to my loyal staff for their commitment and dedication to this project;
and to my partners and readers everywhere who desire an exceptional life. It’s yours—be inspired to succeed!
6. Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality
7. Admit When You’re Not Good at Something and Either Give it Up or Get Some Help
8. Blend Life and Work, Then You’ll Have Balance
9. Do Something Fun for Yourself Every Week
10. Know When It’s Time to Get Out of the Battle and Go to War
11. Dream Big and Work Toward Some Impossibilities
13. Put Things in Writing, So You Can Track Your Progress
15. Creativity is Your Key to Increase
17. Fight for Your Love and Money
18. Learn to Travel with Your Eyes Open
19. Get a Network of “Get It” People
20. Dress the Part if You Really Want the Role
Other Publications by the Author
Media Resources
Introduction
I am absolutely thrilled that you chose to pick up this book. Your decision to read Inspired to Succeed means you have just taken a monumental step in the direction of your dreams. As your life coach, I am here to show you how to achieve on a higher level. Consider every chapter in this book to be a one-on-one coaching session with me.
I have filled these pages with strategies and principles that have served me well on my journey to success. If you follow the keys and insights I share in each chapter, you will reach goals and find success that you may have never before thought possible. I penned this book with a heart to help you. Whatever your position or circumstance in life, you can break out of an average existence and live inspired! Each chapter is full of information and inspiration that is guaranteed to encourage, enlighten and empower you.
I want you to be encouraged to dream. This book contains heart- to-heart help that will cause you to live each day with high expectation and achievement. You will be enlightened on how to do, be and have better. These pages provide insight into exceptional living. Be empowered to rise higher. Leave mediocrity to the masses and gain a new sense of purpose and passion as you learn timeless principles of success that will cause you to excel in every area of your life.
You have a divine right to have the most prosperous and fulfilling life possible, but you must take purposeful steps to attain it. I am here to teach you how. All the information you need to be inspired to succeed is here in the palm of your hand. Like any good coach, I’m going to challenge you to stretch outside of your comfort zone and push you to take immediate action on what you read. But I will also be here cheering you on every step of the way because from this page forward, your life is never going to be the same again. Now, let’s get going and begin what promises to be a dream- defining journey for you, as you get inspired to succeed!
Small Changes, Big Results
“Great acts are made up of small deeds.”
-Lao Tzu
Often when we think of changing our lives, we think of big projects and life-changing shifts—getting the body of a supermodel, buying our dream house or founding the next Fortune 500 company. We see the possibilities and often end up thinking big, way too big! We set ourselves up for failure by aspiring to do too much, too fast, all the while telling ourselves we failed because we didn’t try hard enough. In actuality, the victory is not in trying harder, but starting smaller. Dream big, but execute small. A dramatic self-improvement campaign with a daunting deadline only increases your failure rate. When it comes to success in life, slow and steady usually wins the race.
“Inch by inch, it’s a cinch. Yard by yard, it’s hard.”
- Unknown
Ladies, it’s time to adopt a new philosophy. Repeat after me, “I will make small changes for big results. I will get there little by little!” When you change your approach and focus on doing small things over the long haul, you’ll realize huge gains toward your goals. Inspired to Succeed
BABY STEPS
One of my favorite movies is What About Bob? In it, Bill Murray plays a patient named Bob, suffering from a hundred different worries and neuroses. To regain a normal life, Bob goes to see a psychiatrist for help. The psychiatrist encourages him to take baby steps to overcome his compulsions. His attempts to do this, although funny, eventually work. The storyline is made to be laughable, but the over-simplistic concept of baby steps rings true. You can benefit greatly from starting small
WHEN TO THINK SMALL
Go small if…
*You’re completely overwhelmed by your to-do list.
(“I’m stretched too thin!”)
*You feel paralyzed by the size of your goal.
(“I could climb Mount Everest easier than achieving this.”)
*You lack motivation to work toward your goal.
(“I don’t feel like it right now.”)
*You find yourself procrastinating in multiple areas.
(“I’ll worry about that tomorrow.”)
*You’ve lost hope that change is possible.
(“I give up!”)
The biggest benefit to making small changes is that it’s more motivating and less time-consuming. Would you rather focus on going to the gym to walk a mile on the treadmill each day or practice parking a little farther from the front door each day? It’s a small change, but it can have big results. We all know it’s much easier to take small action steps than scale huge tasks, so adopt a new and smaller strategy. There’s much truth to the childhood riddle: “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” Simple, daily actions build momentum. Plus, the more small, daily victories you achieve, the more confidence you will feel, which will lead you to bigger and better things. The point is not to create a miracle moment, but to develop a better, more sustainable lifestyle. I experienced greater success in life when I learned to take a more balanced approach and make small adjustments that could be maintained over the long haul.
THE TORTOISE AND THE HARE
In the race for the good life, we all can finish strong. I’m here as your life coach to cheer you on to the finish line and show you how to run well. Life is a marathon, not a sprint. That’s where most people miss the secret to success. They underestimate the power of small steps. In looking for the monumental and trying to leap ahead, they overlook the power given to them to make life changes every single day. Greatness comes a little bit at a time. If they focused on copying my method rather than competing, they’d know that while they are looking for shortcuts, I just remain consistent at doing the little things that make a big difference. I might be taking small steps, but I never quit. Some days I’m more hare than tortoise and take steps faster than others, but every single day I am doing something. I’m moving one step closer to my dream.
Make changes that are congruent with your desires. Start heading in the right direction. You needn’t get there overnight, just as long as you get there! There’s something you can do daily. Too many times I hear women lament that it’s so hard to change, but that’s a cop-out. There’s something small everyone can do to better their situation. A lot of small somethings eventually add up to a big something. And something small is always better than nothing at all. A little step toward success is still a step forward, not backward. Who I am today is who I’ve been all along. I developed myself through daily habits, year after year, and that’s been the key to my success. I just stay steady and consistent and my lifestyle stays on the rise. Because this is how my husband and I live our lives, our children have learned to operate like this.
A PENNY A DAY: RYAN’S STORY
When my son was only five years old, I decided to start a fun project with him that would teach him the long-term value of saving money. I got a jar and encouraged him to save at least a penny a day. Whenever my husband and I would get change in the course of our day, we would add it to his collection. Coins seemed like such a small thing to us, but every little bit added up. At the end of every month, we would take him to the bank to see how much he had collected. On average, he would have a couple hundred dollars in just 30 days. As he grew older and my daughter saw how awesome this savings plan was working out for her brother, she decided to join in on the fun, but suggested we raise the ante to dollar bills. So, anytime we received single bills back from a purchase or found one in our billfold, we immediately took it out and set it aside for Ariana and Ryan. They too acquired the discipline of setting aside dollar bills. Sometimes they admitted it was tempting not to use the money out of convenience, but they stayed true to the small habit they had developed. We decided to wait until six months had passed before depositing the cash. As the stacks and stacks of dollar bills grew, it became so motivating for my children. When deposit day came, both of my children had more than $1,000 saved in single dollar bills. What started as a small change yielded a big result. Now, more than six years later, my children have been doing this year after year, and they have saved a tremendous amount. Don’t think this story is just an idea for your kids. Think like a child again yourself. It may feel like it’s nothing when you’re putting your two cents away, but it all adds up!
I recently shared this story with the women in my ministry and encouraged them to begin this habit in their lives. They eagerly stepped up to the challenge. Many of them took it one step further and signed up for a program a local bank was offering that rounded every purchase they made up to the nearest dollar and deposited the change in a savings account. Many ladies confessed this was the easiest change they ever made concerning their money and were loving the results! Small change, big result! What could you do with your money if you made a small change? What would happen if you passed up a coffee habit and instead saved the money you spend each day? What would be the long-term result of brown- bagging it for a period of time or slimming your shopping for a season? While I’m not telling you to give up on an abundant life and live like a simpleton, I am encouraging you to make some small changes now that will yield tremendous results later. It’s worth it!
STUDY SESSIONS: ARIANA’S STORY
Since the time my daughter first started school, she’s always been a self-disciplined student. Even as a young girl, she loved learning, and we encouraged her to make schoolwork a priority in her life. The older Ariana got, it seemed the more she excelled in school. We never had to tell her to do her homework or study for a test, because she practiced this every day without any prompting. It didn’t matter whether we were on a plane headed on vacation or in the car running errands. Wherever we were, Ariana had her homework or a book in her lap, even if she would only have time for 15 minutes of study. Sometimes the trip seemed too short to warrant a bag of books, but Ariana was always one to seize even the smallest span of time to study more. Fast-forward to present day and Ariana’s small steps have paid off grandly! She’s a 4.0 student, the valedictorian of her class and can go to any university of her choice. What was once just 15 minutes of study saved thousands in tuition costs. Small change, big results!
Too often we get awed with the results of others and miss the process that got them there. Don’t make the mistake of wanting to skip over the small stuff and become a big shot. When you cheat the system, you fail. It takes discipline and a lot of character to do the small stuff day in and day out. Master consistency without anxiety or hurry and you will want for nothing in days to come.
“Be faithful in small things, because it is in them that your strength lies.”
-Mother Teresa of Calcutta
SMALL CHANE CAN MAKE FOR BIG RESULTS!
Write down your goals and read them every day. I learned this habit from my husband. He has practiced this habit for more than 20 years. Every single morning, he writes down his goals again as if it’s the first time. This hones his focus and often generates a host of ideas to help him achieve his objectives.
Drink water. Water is the best energy drink on the market. It has a host of benefits including eliminating toxins and poisons from your body, hydrating your skin, carrying nutrients and minerals and aiding weight loss. When your body is full of toxins, you don’t think creatively. If you don’t drink water, start with just one glass a day. Then slowly increase the quantity. Try adding one more glass each day until you reach 8-10 glasses a day.
Exercise. Exercise gives you more energy, powers up your day and boosts your self-esteem. Even if it’s just 10 minutes a day, every little bit adds up. My daughter and I recently started running up and down our stairs for 10 minutes. After just a short session, our lungs feel expanded, our hearts are strengthened and our energy soars. Squeeze in walks during lunch hours or after an evening meal. Another way to fit in more exercise is to park farther from the door everywhere you go. Try adding just 50 more steps to your daily schedule. I invested in a pedometer so I can actually track my increased steps. I get most of my extra steps while power- shopping in the mall. Small change, big results!
Clean every day for 10 minutes. Sure, spring cleaning takes a lot longer, but you can create a sense of order and harmony in any room of your house just by tidying for 10 minutes each day. Add excellence to every room in your home. Clearing the clutter adds harmony, makes your home aesthetically pleasing and creates an environment conducive to creative thinking. The more welcoming your environment, the more you will produce there.
Read 15 minutes a day. So you can’t read an entire book in one night. Just 15 minutes can give you a wealth of information that you wouldn’t have had before. In fact, just 15 minutes of reading every single day over four year’s time is equivalent to a bachelor’s degree. Reading doesn’t have to be lengthy to be beneficial. Even small bursts of positive information will change your outlook on life and cause you to be filled with information, strategies and ideas throughout your day. Reading truly is the key to succeeding.
Work at work. It doesn’t take much to stand out from the office pack. Studies show that 87% of the work force won’t work unless supervised. This means by simply working at work, you’re in the top tier. Work hard and smart and you will be promoted often. As employers, my husband and I know this to be true. We always reward those who work well. It doesn’t take much. Here are three basic skills that will always keep you employed: Show up on time regularly. Obey instructions. Talk and act respectfully. Master these and you’ll always keep your job and your perspective.
30 More Small Things I Recommend:
1. Hug your child or spouse.
2. Write a daily To-Do list before you go to bed.
3. Lay out your clothes the night before.
4. Eat smaller portions.
5. Listen more intently.
6. Say “I love you” often.
7. Do one thing you don’t want to do each day.
8. Buy books.
9. Pray daily.
10. Read a chapter from the Bible daily.
11. Give big tips.
12. Say “thank you.”
13. Compliment others.
14. Listen to positive audio messages.
15. Journalize often.
16. Eat breakfast every morning.
17. Find a reason to laugh daily.
18. Encourage your children.
19. Become your spouse’s biggest cheerleader.
20. Travel more.
21. Buy quality over quantity.
22. Surround yourself with positive people.
23. Pay a little extra toward each bill, even if it’s just cents.
24. Go to church a lot.
25. Eat healthy snacks.
26. Watch less TV.
27. Capture important memories with your camera.
28. Attend at least one conference a year.
29. Clear out the clutter.
30. Celebrate others’ success.
No matter what your past excuse has been or the size of the goal you are up against, if you have the intention to change and make small, consistent steps over time, it works! Here's my challenge to you: test this out and see for yourself. For the next week, choose just one small thing to do differently and commit to it. At the end of the week, check out the results. If you like what you see, keep it up for a whole month. Soon you’ll be on your way to a lifestyle habit and some big, big results!
*******
Small Changes, Big Results
Inspiration & Application:
Dream big, but execute small.
Making small changes is more motivating and less time-consuming.
The point is not to create a miracle moment, but to develop a better, more sustainable lifestyle.
Make changes that are congruent with your desires.
Start heading in the right direction.
There’s something small everyone can do to better their situation. A lot of small somethings eventually add up to a big something.
*******
Celebrate Life Always
“Celebrate the happiness that friends are always giving, make every day a holiday and celebrate just living!”
-Amanda Bradley
Life is a celebration. From the moment you were born, you were given the greatest gift you could ever receive—the gift of life! I believe the present is truly that—a present—a moment for you to enjoy the endless possibilities that lie on the road ahead. From the time I wake up, I celebrate life, just knowing today is another day for me to dream new dreams, pursue grand goals and improve myself if need be. You too can have a joyful journey just by choosing to make it so. Your life doesn’t have to be boring. It can be as exciting as that of any supermodel or superhero. All you have to do is accept life’s offer; it’s asking you to jump in and join in the fun!
“I never lose sight of the fact that just being is fun.”
-Katharine Hepburn
Celebrating your life doesn’t start when you slip a painted toe into your stilettos as you get glam for your next social event. Today needn’t be your birthday for you to stop and celebrate. You can celebrate life every day. Each day, you get to be the guest of honor in your own life, so why not make it a party! Approach your job, mate, children and day with expectation and enthusiasm. Celebration is more than an event, it’s an attitude—one that will greatly increase the quality of your lifestyle. So let’s broaden our party perspective.
By my definition, women who celebrate life always are women who refuse to allow the mundane, an attitude of ungratefulness or a lack of appreciation to exist in their living space. In protest of the average, they live vibrantly, brightly and happily as if every day were a party. They appreciate every moment given to them and make the most of the life they have been blessed with. A life without celebration, gratitude and appreciation is lackluster. Don’t choose to live that way.
“The more you praise and celebrate your life,
the more there is in life to celebrate.”
-Oprah Winfrey
Instead, make a choice to enjoy life to the fullest. You’ve only been blessed with one life to live. So don’t allow your life and the lives of those you love to pass by you unannounced. With all that God has provided us, it’s a shame to live in day-to-day drab. In fact, I refuse to do it! I don’t want to merely pass through life; I want to enjoy the journey. I love my full life and all the goals, commitments and to-do lists that come with it. It takes a daily focus and flexibility to keep up with the family, work, ministry and personal schedules we all juggle. Life would be dull without all these purposeful things to pursue. However, in striving to make a living, I make sure to have a life. Celebrations should be the exclamation points in a well-crafted life.
THE ART OF THE PARTY
I am a party planner by nature. Parties are my passion. I love them so much that I’m convinced a part of my call is to throw big bashes and grandiose galas. From planning the décor to running through the event schedule with my staff to choosing what goes in the goody bags, something about planning the hundreds of little details that go into these extravagant events brings out the best in me. Parties offer a burst of excitement for myself and my guests. Although it’s a load of fun, it’s far from frivolous. Party planning and entertaining is as important as your other daily work, so you must fit it in. People are valuable and worth celebrating.
Consider the following scenario. You are attending a theatre performance. At the end of an excellent scene, there is no reaction from the audience. Not one person claps, cheers or even smiles. Imagine if you were one of the performers. How would you feel? Under normal circumstances, most people would feel concerned or disappointed, if not completely devastated. It’s easy to believe in and understand the importance of celebrating success in the theatre or sports arena, but so often we celebrate too little in the lives of those we love most. You may not be a party gal like me, but someone needs you to jumpstart the joy in their life. Someone needs you to say, “You’re special” and love them lavishly with fanfare and festivities. Maybe it’s your husband, your children, your girlfriends or your staff that needs a day to shine. In the end, we all need moments of celebration in our lives, and you can be the person who makes the difference.
Make time to celebrate. The reason I say “make” time is because planning parties does take time. When I throw events, I go to painstaking measures to ensure every detail will delight my guests. I plan every event to a “T” and add in the little surprising extras because that is the type of event I would want thrown for me. When guests attend these events, the comment I get the most is, “How did you find time to plan such an excellent event?” It’s simple —I made the time. I realized a long time ago that there would never be a perfect day to plan a party. There is never a week when I can clear my entire schedule and plan the event from start to finish. However, I can make it fit within my schedule by purposing to do so. The party girl’s motto is always: “Celebration and fun? It can be done!” Times of celebration are meant to be a lifestyle, not a luxury! It’s necessary for an inspired life!
I take pleasure in bringing people together for a good time and wowing them with extravagant extras. I’ve thrown many a party, from posh, private affairs to guest lists that topped 500.Each has been a unique expression of my sense of style, my passion for people and my deep joy to celebrate others through giving. I could fill all the pages of this book delighting you with the details, but a picture is worth a thousand words, so you’ll just have to get my DVD, Inspiring Entertaining.
“Life is too quick and too fabulous to let it slip by
without raising a glass.”
-David Tutera
What I do want to share with you is the significance of celebration to truly living the good life. A timely celebration can forge friendships, kindle passion for purpose and enrich your family heritage. Take a pause for the cause as I take you inside three fabulous fétes. May they inspire you to remember and celebrate what and who is important in your life!
WELCOME TO WOMANHOOD
I’ve always had a birthday party for my daughter, since the age of two. Every party has been full of meaning and has celebrated a chapter of her life. As the day for her 18th birthday neared, I knew I wanted to do something memorable for her big day that would pass down our family’s values and celebrate this important rite of passage. I have always been inspired by the Jewish tradition of bat mitzvahs and Latina quinceaneras. I wanted to commemorate this very special year for my daughter by doing something substantial not only for her personally but for our Christian heritage. I wanted to start a new tradition in the body of Christ. This birthday was a celebration of her life and a graduation from being a young girl into a thriving woman, so I dubbed the theme “Welcome to Womanhood.” I planned every detail of this party to be rich with meaning and significance. The night started with so much excitement. My daughter looked like a princess in her pink designer dress layered with tiers of pink tulle. To add to the pageantry, I orchestrated 17 of her closest friends to be her court. They looked resplendent, with the girls in gorgeous pink gowns and the guys in tuxedos. Hundreds of people were at the venue, with many of her closest friends from around the country flying in by private jet to celebrate her big day.
As the party began, each couple in the court strolled down the center aisle, bearing huge gift boxes. Each pair took their position on either side of an ornate golden throne centered on the stage, awaiting the guest of honor. Classical music played as the court waited with anticipation for the debutante’s grand entrance. Next was a military salute, as officers from several branches of the armed forces marched in with precision and grace, drawing swords and creating a canopy for Ariana to walk under. When Ariana made her appearance, she looked every part of royalty. It was a moment I will never forget as she crossed over from a girl to a woman.
As Ariana took the stage and sat on her throne, my husband came and pronounced a blessing over her life. After the blessing came the meaningful goodies my husband and I had picked out to bless our daughter and signify her new “grown-woman” status. Each member of the court presented her with our gifts, including engraved, silver photo albums, engraved Chanel perfume, designer heels, a custom pink passport cover and a fabulous Louis Vuitton attaché for her laptop. These gifts were our way of preparing her to be a woman of culture and class. I would be remiss if I did not mention my husband later surprised Ariana by announcing that he was upgrading her H3 Hummer to the newest model! She almost fainted from excitement!
The evening continued as haute couture transitioned into hip-hop, infusing the evening with expressions of Ariana’s personality and passions. The Life Changers Christian Center performing arts troupe showed incredible displays of drama, dance and step drill. The choir rocked the stage, bringing everyone to their feet as they remixed the popular song, “I’m Every Woman.” The night came to a crescendo with video and vocal tributes from friends and mentors who wanted to welcome Ariana into womanhood with words of congratulations.
The entire affair was a rich tribute that has begun a tradition in the body of Christ. In the days that followed, I received tons of letters and emails from attendees, expressing how much the event meant to them and their children. The party was on the lips of all the teens at school for weeks and the parents of the kids on the court called to tell me how much it meant to their children to be a part of such a momentous occasion. The inquiries about the party spread to educators and youth ministries around the country wanting more details, so I decided to turn it into a DVD and make this tool available to all.
Whether you’re a parent desiring to enrich your family’s heritage or a group leader interested in replicating an event to welcome young people to adulthood in a significant way, it is my hope that this tool will help raise a new breed of young adults. Meaningful times of celebration in the lives of our children breed a higher level of success in them. That’s why I never take my children’s birthdays or special accomplishments lightly. You can use parties to promote your child’s purpose, pass on family values and establish your family’s code of conduct. It takes time and careful planning, but the results are worth it!
MY BIBLE STUDY BASHES
Being a part of my Bible study is like attending the largest girlfriend gathering every month. It’s an atmosphere of grand celebration. Each month I choose a different theme that I bring to life in a fashionably elegant way. Just walking in the room is electrifying. I’ve seen women cry at the door from being so overwhelmed, not only by the beauty and grandeur, but also by the love and kindness that fills the room and emanates from my ladies. One woman, who traveled hours to attend, said she had heard of the incredible things that were happening at Successful Living Bible Study, but thought a Bible study like this could only be a fantasy. After she came and experienced it for herself, she said it really was a dream come true for her. Why do I go to such great lengths to make an impression? Because I believe that being a Christian should be fun. I am inspired to live my life in a big way and help others to do the same. Ladies, life is huge!
I have put on such spectacular events that now the women themselves want to come to my events in a spectacular way. One out-of-town group that attends the Bible study decided to rent stretch Hummer limousines and bring their entire group of 75 ladies to Bible study in style. It was an awesome sight to see and it set their expectations for the night on a high level. Many of them had never ridden in a limousine before, but because of my Bible study event they began to dream on the next level and experience on the next level. I’ve been told that the word is out. Ladies know that if they are in one of my areas, my Bible study is the place to be. They enjoy the empowering, girly time just for them.
Every woman deserves time designated solely to her personal growth and nurturing. Women give so much. That’s why they love Successful Living Bible Study because it’s all about giving to them. Ladies from the East Coast to the Midwest don’t think twice about coming because they tell me it’s a night they need. I even created a private Bible study for my celebrity friends so they can be inspired and encouraged in an atmosphere that is conducive to them. No matter which of the Bible studies ladies attend, they love it because it’s a celebration in their honor they never forget. Attending celebrations like these help transform a life of predictable pursuits into a legacy of merriment and meaning.
A STYLISH STAFF SOIREE
This party was my way of celebrating my staff and letting them know I was concerned about their work, but also their look. At this party, I challenged each of my guests to create a storyboard of their ideal work wardrobe. I had tables and tables filled with the latest issues of every fashion magazine on the market. With lively music playing in the background, the fun began. While my guests and I busied ourselves cutting and pasting fashionable looks on our boards, the shop talk began. I shared with them all the “It Items” for spring and educated them on the look that would work best for each of them. Everyone got a chance to showcase her board and show off her new look. Then the party moved to my closet, where I gave the girls a peek at my latest purchases of shoes, jewelry, clothes and coats, leaving them bubbly with excitement. When the night was done, each girl left with fashionable goodies I gave them as parting gifts and their faith prop for their new look. Within weeks, I noticed improvements in their image. Instead of a relaxed day job look, their image said “high-power executive.” The party accomplished its goal, but in a fun and innovative way. That was my creative way of doing a performance review. All work and no play can make you dull and drab, so keep your life and look poppin’! These are just three of many celebrations that I have hosted to add fun and flair to my life and others. Don’t wait for an occasion to celebrate. Whether you are the guest of honor or the host with the most, celebrate life every day and in every way. Life is a continual party when you purpose for it to be. Consider this your exclusive invitation to join in on the fun!
*******
Celebrate Life Always
Inspiration & Application:
The present is truly that—a present—a moment for you to enjoy the endless possibilities that lie on the road ahead.
Celebration is more than an event, it’s an attitude— one that will greatly increase the quality of your lifestyle.
Don’t allow your life and the lives of those you love to pass you by unannounced.
Celebration is a vital part of the good life. Learn to celebrate every day in every way.
You can use parties to promote your child’s purpose, pass on family values and establish your family’s code of conduct.
*******
Live Gorgeously
“Zest is the secret of all beauty.
There is no beauty that is attractive without zest.”
-Christian Dior
I wholeheartedly concur, Monsieur Dior! Being gorgeous is not for the weak. It takes strength, discipline and dare I say zeal to refuse the acceptable, preferring instead the exceptional. Do you want to be adequate or astonishing? You are perfectly within your rights to be exceptional, extraordinary and divine. Some may consider this an elitist attitude, but isn’t that why we are here—to be the best we can be? Why live, if you are not living? Support on your road to gorgeous living will be sparse. I, however, will always be on the sidelines cheering as you endeavor to pursue the best. Today is the day to acquire an appetite for being amazing.
“We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.”
-Marianne Williamson
Living gorgeously is about being the entire package, not just a one-trick pony. You should be beautiful and smart. Living gorgeously is allowing your inner substance to reveal itself in a substantially attractive expression. Brains and beauty are not required to be mutually exclusive of one another. In my book, The Good Life Guide to Beauty, I dedicated a chapter to bashing your beauty bully. A beauty bully is that little voice telling you the effort required to be impeccable is frivolous and unnecessary. I am here to tell you that your effort, or lack thereof, can and will make a difference in your life. You will only receive the opportunities in life that you are prepared for. Your appearance is the key that opens the door and gives your highly advanced intellect an opportunity to shine.
I am a glamour girl and I never apologize for that. I am a modern, contemporary woman who knows a truly feminine woman carries a powerful presence. I relish all things feminine, from lipsticks and lotions to handbags and haute couture—if it’s girly, I’ve got it—in spades. I can mix it up in the boardroom and the beauty salon. You will never mistake me for simple Cymbeline, for whom playwright William Shakespeare noted: “her beauty and her brain go not together.” I’m talking about style and substance, sister! The road to gorgeous living begins right here. Now is the time to get it tight and right. Begin building a blueprint for your own unique and extraordinary beauty.
GORGEOUS GIRLS ARE ADAMENT ABOUT UPKEEP
Living gorgeously often means that what others consider indulgent should be your necessities. We live in a fast-paced world, but gorgeous girls never lag behind in the upkeep department. Learn to take the time to get really ready. Stop walking out the door without giving yourself a thorough once-over. Do you really look your best today? What reason could there be for not putting your best face forward? Whatever reason you think you have: the kids, the alarm or the all-night project, I’m here to tell you that it is no a good enough excuse for personal neglect.
Package yourself for success. Everyone is a salesperson in this world and if you can’t buy into your own beauty, you can’t expect others to buy into your success. Don’t get lazy or lax with your looks. Make a commitment today to really take care of yourself each and every day.
“There is no such thing as an ugly woman, only a lazy one.”
-Helena Rubinstein
I know a lady who has a 45-minute commute to work and is required to be at her desk by 7:30 am. She gets herself up, washes, blow dries and properly curls her hair, gets dressed, wakes up her two daughters, dresses them immaculately with matching hair accessories and is never late. She arrives to work fully made up every day. Her coworkers chastised her for years, telling her it was perfectly OK if she missed a step in the process; no one really saw them anyway since most of their work was via telephone. Why bother? She never answered her critics; she just continued her daily routine, day after day, year after year. That’s a woman who is living gorgeously. There may not be an external reason for what she did, but internally she had a conviction that she and her daughters were important enough to look their very best every day. She gets my vote for gorgeous girl. This exhibits what we already know: Critics always know the cost of everything, but neglect acknowledging the true value. The cost of being gorgeous is paid in discipline, forethought and effort, but the value of high self-esteem and fearless confidence is invaluable.
Speaking of cost, always remember, money does not make you gorgeous. Today, I have the privilege of buying top-of-the-line clothes, makeup and accessories, but what really makes me walk confidently are the fundamentals I mastered before I could afford the designer goods. Here are a few pointers from my primer for creating a polished appearance: Never underestimate the power of clean. Soap and water can be attained for a bargain, but they reap a cache of wealth in self-esteem and self-respect. Develop a bathing ritual that cultivates self-care. Become skilled at caring for your body. Do not allow another sunset to lapse without immersing yourself fully in water. I lean into luxury with scented shower gels during my long and luxurious showers and pamper myself with lotions, perfumes and powders afterward. When I have even more time, I surround my bathtub with scented candles, turn on the stereo and wash the cares of the world away. Sure, you may be accustomed to a quick shower, but set the bar higher than the status quo. Once you really embrace the ritual of bathing and not just washing, you will improve the way you admire and appreciate yourself.
GORGEOUS GIRLS LOOK GOOD AROUND THE CLOCK
Living gorgeously means considering all the details of your life. Are you just pulling it together when all eyes are on you? I decided years ago that I would be gorgeous all the time, even when no one was looking. I invested in beautiful pajamas and daywear for those times when I am lounging around the house. I even have my pajamas tailored so they fit perfectly. If you can have house shoes, why not house clothes? It’s another reason to shop, ladies! Self- check time: If someone rings your bell at night, what are they likely to encounter? Oversized T-shirts from college and cartoon-themed, oversized slippers? Perhaps Grandma’s old house dress, passed down to a new generation? Come on girl, get gorgeous for real. It’s what people don’t see that reveals the most about you.
Invest in your quiet time. Buy cotton, silk or terry cloth sets that caress you after a hard day’s work. I have so many great options for my home life. Some are classic pajamas, others are cut like track suits with a pant, a tank and a zip-up jacket for discretion. There is a whole world of loungewear available to enjoy on any budget. Make a plan to buy a set this weekend and see the difference it makes in how you feel. I promise you will sleep better and wake up happier. That is gorgeous living!
GORGOEUS GIRLS PUT FORTH EFFORT
Become passionately zealous about yourself again. An image that appears effortless takes a lot of energy, no matter what those glossy magazines would have you believe. Natural beauty is rare; we all need enhancing and maintenance. Learn the importance of impeccable maintenance because that is the little-known key to image and health preservation.
There’s an ancient French proverb that says, “A woman is no older than she looks.” Europeans are known for aging well and they attribute it to their personal care regimens. From their youth, girls are drilled to take proper care of their skin. C'est magnifique! Take a tip from these fabulous femmes; you will look better and younger longer when you put in more authentic maintenance time. If you speak with your hands, what are they saying? Hopefully, they are not screaming for a hydrating manicure. If you are walking into a bright future, are your feet properly pedicured for the trip? Have you been maintaining your million-dollar smile? Are your teeth clean, bright and gorgeous? Do your clothes look effortlessly chic or just effortless? In my Image Course, clothing care, such as washing and ironing, is stressed. We actually have someone demonstrate how to properly iron a shirt, a pair of pants and a skirt. Crisp, clean clothes make the man—and the woman.
“A beautiful woman doesn’t have to choose between living a great life and looking ten years younger. Living a great life can lead to looking ten years younger. Now, that's beautiful.”
-Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen
That clean, fresh, “I take care of myself” look will always give you the edge in any social situation. To look unforced and naturally chic surely requires effort, but the payoff is walking out the door ready to diligently pursue your plans and dreams without the restraint of insecurity.
GORGEOUS GIRLS SET NEW STANDARDS
Have high style. Living gorgeously requires you to raise your standards. Living above the norm will require you to know more, ask for more and sometimes even insist for better. I always say, “people do what you inspect, not what you expect.” Scrutinize everything about your beauty regimen. You don’t just have to settle for a good haircut, you must have a gorgeous one. Go to your stylist with a vision in hand for your hair or makeup look. Work directly with your technician and demand that they give you the best possible interpretation of that look. Don’t accept their cookie-cutter daily special—this is your image we are talking about here!
“Gorgeous hair is the best revenge.”
-Ivana Trump
I am very particular about my manicures and pedicures. I let my manicurist know exactly what I want and I compensate her for giving me exceptional service. Most professional technicians want your creative input and your positive feedback. It helps them sharpen their technique when they know you expect and appreciate their absolute best. If your usual technician is offended by your courteous collaboration, it’s time to find someone else. Only the best technicians can give you the expertise that will result in your best look.
Never adjust to average. Have a special air about you. Add a “WOW” factor to your life. What makes your life go wow? What makes your marriage go wow? What makes your image go wow? Glamour! Add glamour wherever you can. Make the effort in every area of your life to do more than just exist. Put more effort into making your life and yourself better. Accessorize your look and your life. Accessories always add glamour. Don’t just wear pants and a top; add a stunning bag or outstanding shoes to make your outfit pop! Don’t just waste the weekend; throw a lavish dinner party with a few of your closest friends. Buy some new music and have a sampling party. Take your children to the theatre. Accessorize your life with good times, meaningful relationships and beautiful things. An accessorized life is a gorgeous one.
Begin to collect pieces that totally excite you. Whenever I am shopping for anything, whether it’s makeup, clothes, shoes or furniture, my selections must totally excite me for me to make a purchase. I do not wish to tolerate the boring or hum drum in my personal space. My glamour and wow factors stay at high levels due to my attention to details and my enthusiasm about personal upkeep and maintaining an inspiring living space. Get excited about who you are and the life you’ve been blessed with. Don’t let your life stay in the rut of the regular.
All of these tips are a part of my glamour equation. Do the math for yourself: your image plus your confidence equals the doors that will open for you in life. The level of care you give yourself is in direct proportion to the level of respect others will give you. If you want others to care, then you should care more. You will only have the gorgeous life you are willing to create for yourself. If you take these action steps and increase your care quota, I can guarantee your success quotient will take you to new and inspiring places.28Inspired to Succeed
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Live Gorgeously
Inspiration & Application:
The cost of being gorgeous is paid in discipline, forethought and effort, but the value of high self- esteem and fearless confidence is invaluable.
Living gorgeously means considering all the details of your life.
Become passionately zealous about yourself again.
Living above the norm will require you to know more, ask for more and sometimes even insist for better.
Accessorize your life with good times, meaningful relationships and beautiful things. An accessorized life is a gorgeous one.
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Purposefully Plan
“It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt
Planning is a lifestyle. But I promise not to bore you to sleep with a drawn-out speech on goal-setting and time management. And I certainly won’t pull out charts and graphs and try to color-code your schedule for you. Instead, I want to charge you to get creative and challenge yourself to change. Being a planner isn’t hard; it’s easy, creative and fun. It’s what you do to make all the people, passions and projects in your world fit. Being a master planner is about learning how you can fulfill your potential while still balancing your life. Girls, no matter what you’re a guru at—be it raising children or raising capital—this chapter is for you! Today’s woman has her hands in many things—raising a successful family, volunteering in the church, running a business or running for office.
The world is ripe with opportunities and possibilities for any woman who is a planner. Although I have always purposed to live life well, I would never have dreamed how far the principles of planning could have taken me. Today, my purpose involves different components—writing books, ministering around the country, co- pastoring Life Changers Christian Center alongside my husband, raising a family, managing a staff and running a business. I wouldn’t be able to do all the things I do if I didn’t learn how to master me time by having a plan. I am where I am because I plan where and what I want to be. I am a master planner. I have been operating like this for years. I plan everything, and I really mean everything. I plan what I will wear daily, what foods we will eat in our home, our vacations, my itinerary, etc. If there is to be a successful purpose for anything, it will require a plan.
I’ve learned during the years that the better I plan, the better I become at doing more than one thing. I can be a mother, a bestselling author, an executive, an entrepreneur, a motivational speaker, a wife and a mentor and I still have time to enjoy life. My plan increases my productivity, and my productivity increases my profitability. I am busier than I have ever been, but I produce more. Planning is the hidden secret behind my successful life.
Girls, I want you to grasp the power of planning. Life is as worthwhile as you plan for it to be. There are just some things that you will never be able to accomplish until you become a more purposeful planner. You can have the talent, the money and even the position, but if you lack a plan for your day and your life, you won’t achieve like you should. Having a plan helps you put into place the organization necessary to meet your goals.
LOUIS AND ME
Louis Vuitton is one of my favorite stores. I love the handbags, shoes and life accessories. Rarely do I travel without making a stop in a LV store. It stands to reason that one of my most important tools comes from the Vuitton lineage. I carry a multicolor monogram agenda created for Louis Vuitton by designer Takashi Murakami. A gift from one of my dearest friends and essential to my daily planning, I never leave home without it. Inside it are my written plans detailing everything I need at a glance. Not only does it contain my goals for the year and my to-do lists, but it also stores my shopping list of the clothes I want for the upcoming season, a list of all my speaking engagements, a list of gifts I need to purchase for upcoming occasions, my confessions, my family vacation schedule and a few messages in case I have to minister somewhere unexpectedly. This doesn’t prevent interruptions, but it helps me to keep flowing no matter what arises. I’m not extreme where I plan every minute; I just know that a day that’s not planned is often stolen and wasted away. Life is much too precious for that. I plan to spend time with my husband, I plan to play with my kids and I plan to complete my God-given assignments. I plan my travel itinerary, Bible study events, conferences, church events and vacations all at least a year ahead of time. My secretary, personal assistant, nannies, household staff and I all sit down once a week to review and coordinate schedules so everything at home and work runs smoothly. When it comes to being effective at multi-tasking, you must have a plan. Life doesn’t get good until you get a plan. A successful life is an intentional life. Develop a plan for everything.
TEN PLANS THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE IN PLACE
1. Plan your wardrobe. Create a list of items you need to upgrade your look for the upcoming season. Assign outfits you will wear to specific events. Plan when and where you will take shopping trips and how much you will spend.
2. Plan your vacations. Determine where and when you want to go. Create a budget for your trip and make detailed preparation plans.
3. Plan your finances. Plan how much you want to sow, save and spend. Plan how much money you want to earn this year and get creative about strategizing new streams of income.
4. Plan your marriage. Set aside time in your schedule for romantic outings and vision sharing. Plan to be intimate often.
5. Plan your meals. Write down your menu for the week or even the month. Plan when you will grocery shop and create a grocery budget. Plan healthy snacks for you and your family.
6. Plan your personal growth. Set aside funds for books, seminars and courses. Write down a reading plan and create a list of books to purchase. Set personal growth goals and execute your plan.
7. Plan your spiritual walk. Make a plan for your prayer time and Bible study. Plan to be at church a lot and to make church a priority in your family’s life. To make attending service easier, plan what you and your family will be wearing the night before.
8. Plan your relationships. Plan outings with your girlfriends and gifts you want to give.
9. Plan your children’s development. Plan out the activities, camps and programs you want your children to be involved in. Plan personal growth outings and adventures to take with them. Plan special time together as a family and alone time with each child so you can pour into them. This affirms their self-esteem and helps them grow.
10. Plan your life’s end. I don’t mean to be morbid or morose, but it’s good to have plans in place for when you pass so it doesn’t fall on your children. Plan where and how you want to be buried and make sure you have enough life insurance to leave an inheritance and cover funeral expenses.
FAMILY PLANNING
I plan to have a good marriage by scheduling date nights once a week with my husband. I schedule “dream days” where my husband and I freely share our hearts, hopes and dreams. You have to plan this kind of communication. You must purpose to be intimate. Plan your romance. I love spontaneous gifts and unexpected gestures of love from my husband, but those are just icing on the cake. My husband and I have a successful marriage because we plan on purpose every year to take our marriage up a level.
I also plan for our family to be successful. I plan good family vacations every year with my children. We sit down at the start of each year and discuss where everyone wants to travel. Then we plan the trip itinerary and create a financial plan so we have the resources we need to fully enjoy ourselves on the trip. Good vacations are a result of having a plan.
We also plan our goals as a family. In our annual goal-setting meetings, we include our personal assistants, our domestic care manager and our child care assistant, because their role is important in keeping our home running smoothly. During this meeting, everyone shares their goals for the year and their plan for achieving their goals. We talk about ways we can support one another in reaching our goals and pray over them. Then, we execute our plan throughout the year. Because we have raised our children from a very young age to be planners, they achieve big too. Whatever you are, you pass down. Girls, it’s time to pass down a legacy of achievement by teaching your children to plan! If you want life to get better, plan better—for everything. The plan you execute every day determines the direction of your life. Learn to plan well. Let me share with you my fail-proof planning process. It works!
1. PLAN YOUR DAY