Excerpt for Dad’s Day Out - Strategic Thinking for the Boardroom, Bedroom and Boat - Vol. 1 by , available in its entirety at Smashwords

Dad’s Day Out - Strategic Thinking for
the Boardroom, Bedroom and Boat - Vol. 1

ISBN: 9780463444115

Copyright 2019 The Editor’s Office PL, Huon Valley, Tasmania, Australia.

Smashwords Edition, License Notes: Please respect the hard work of the authors, editors and compilers.This ebook is licensed for your personal use. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, then please purchase your own copy at

All stories by
Matt Flynn


The Stories

1 - Fat Farting Deckies
2 - The Case for Bottled Water
3 - The Blunder Down Under
4 - Victoria’s Secret
5 - Personality Traits
6 - Extreme Cushions
7 - Our Wicked Problem

8 - Battered Fish and Chimps

9 - Personality Disorders
10 - Dealing with Quirky People

11 - Fish Brains
12 - Distortions in Thinking

13 - Fishing Rock Starts

14 - Illusory Truth and Other Bias


Chapter 1 – Fat, Farting Deckies

Don’t ditch that fat, farting deckhand just yet.

Here’s why.

Science has found that smelling farts is good for you.

And research shows that mosquitoes prefer fat people.

Bold students from the University of Exeter explored the effect of breathing farts.

They found that exposure to hydrogen sulfide (fart gas) could stop mitochondrial damage.

This means sniffing farts could help prevent significant diseases.

While hydrogen sulfide gas is harmful in large doses, the study suggested a whiff here and there could reduce the risk of cancer, strokes, heart attacks, arthritis, and dementia.

Dr Matt Whiteman said researchers were now replicating fart gas in a new compound called AP39.

For a beer-swilling fisherman, and everyone else for that matter, this is good news.

I am guessing that from among the mangroves we will now hear phrases like: “There-ya-go mate, a nice dose of AP39 is coming your way.”

Even better than a farting deckhand is one who complains constantly about mozzie bites.

You may have thought you were the harder man or woman, because your deckie moans more than you when mozzies set in.

But science has found it is more likely that you just smell bad.

A study tells us mosquitoes prefer certain people.

The attractiveness seems to be about body odour.

University of Florida staff released mosquitoes into a tube divided off into two sections.

The mozzies were allowed to fly down either side towards the person they were most attracted to.

Researchers found that pregnant women and fat people were selected by mosquitoes and midges.

The implications for choosing deckies are obvious.

While most would question the ethics of befriending or purposely creating a pregnant deckhand, fat deckies are a dime a dozen.

May I suggest the portly deckie is also handy when working the shallows.

In a tinny, moving the big bloke to the bow can save the skipper the job of trimming the outboard leg up.

So, the plus-size deckie is really a multi-purpose tool, being a pseudo shallow-drive, a bug decoy, and a reliable source of AP39.

Please don’t think for a moment that I am singling fat people out for ridicule.

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