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Wisdom For Handling Mistakes

© COPY RIGHT – Bolaji O.Timothy

Bolaji O. Timothy

Published by Rabboni Resort

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2018 Bolaji O. Timothy

ISBN 978-978-55660-4-8

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book. However, the use of quotation is permitted in critical reviews or articles.



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Except otherwise stated all Scriptural References are from New King James Version (NKJV) these scriptural references are Bold and Italic for.

Other quotations are in Italics.









DEDICATION

This book is dedicated to those who have tripped, realised they did, attempted and attempting to ensure that they get back on their feet and hit the ground ruining peacefully and purposefully with hope and courage. I am sincerely moved by the potential inspiration you are creating!







TABLE OF CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGMENT

PREFACE

CHAPTER ONE- THE NEED FOR THIS

CHAPTER TWO - THE EXPLOIT OF WRONG

CHAPTER THREE-SOURCES OF MISTAKE

CHAPTER FOUR-THE SAME OLD WRONG

CHAPTER FIVE- HOST OF MISTAKE

CHAPTER SIX- PEAKS OF MISTAKES

CHAPTER SEVEN- DEALING WITH UNCERTAINTIES

CHAPTER EIGHT- THE MIRACLES OF MERCY

CHAPTER NINE - RETRACING YOUR FUTURE

CHAPTER TEN-WISDOM DEALINGS

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT



I am indebted to the Almighty God who in His infinite wisdom granted me the inspiration, understanding and ability to get this book published. This work was encouraged by the commitment of friends who felt that such material should not be kept Idle.



My special gratitude goes Mr. Julius Olukunle, Imnona Peter and Agaviezor Brilliant whose words and physical substances were sources of encouragement most especially, in the early stage of the work. My profound thanks goes to Miss Olagbaju Seun and Tosin, Olaoye olarenwaju and Atiku Toyin for their immense contributions during the first proof reading of the first.



The effort of Olasunkanmi Adele Salu’s family before and after the initial pages were compiled is sincerely appreciated. Also, I must appreciate the effort of Late Rev. Festus Ilesanmi Bolaji who gave me access to His library when it matters. The effort of Mr and Mrs Ernest Ighravwe is appreciated. Their suggestions were great contributions to this work.

The patience, sacrifice and contributions of my wife and family is greatly appreciated. Many have directly and indirectly contributed to this work, I appreciate all.



I sincerely pray that the father of peace will perfect all that concern these ones.

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PREFACE



Recognising and understanding the need for quality living is a step to aiming for an inspiring life. This book is designed to encourage, not to condemn.



There are expectant spectators and participants of life watching individual or group of people conform to worthy standards. A rightly conducted actions are best life’s scenarios. However, mistakes may still occur. Continuous making of mistakes have power to negatively affect the present and future life. As a result of this, we cannot ignore the wisdom to handle mistakes nor ignore the need to living a quality life.



This book is prepared for Leaders and their Followers, Pastor and their Flocks, Parents and their children, Teachers and Students, Husbands and their wives and as many who passionately love quality living. It is important to read with an open mind, sincere composure and readiness to make necessary changes.



While reading this book, the need for change from old way of life and then start writing on new pages, a more careful, neat and inspiring way will be suggested. Journeying through a more organised and purposeful route rather than patronise confusion will be encouraged. Readers will be confronted with need to sacrifice ego, pride, time, knowledge and resources in making life a solution.

I am sincerely encouraged by the fact that there is always hope despite trenches of wrong , erected theatre of sorrow and planted seeds of pain because of mistakes. There is the mercy of God, if positive change is desired and sought earnestly.



The miracle of mercy is the ever-constant provision of hope God made available for every generation. God’s mercy is the wonder installed in God’s love! We will need to seek God’s face to access mercy.

There is self-evaluations at the end of each chapter. Each points in the last chapter is closed with self-evaluation exercise. This we need attention, time, sincerity and willingness to effect a change. Self-evaluations exercise were provided to each point in chapter ten. These may need personal or group’s retreat or a set aside period for a thorough discussion. The sincere discovery must be applied to individual or group of peoples’ goals, visions, ways of life, the present and the future.



I pray that God will bless your reading hopeful discovery and blissful and applicable solution. AMEN.

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Chapter One



NEEDS FOR THIS



He that breaks the hedge, the snake will bite him. Ecclesiastes 10:8.



Many generations of nations, organisations and families are in serious limitations because of past mistakes made by some set of people or leaders. Many peoples’ promotion are rescheduled to far distant future because of some mistakes made just once or continuously.

History is rich with stories of action taken wrongly by an individual or group of people. Unfortunately their effects had made many slaves in places they should have been kings. Fortunes had slipped off hands of many, Territories were conquered and kingdoms overthrown because of one or two decisions acted wrongly.



Our decisions at various times in the past have direct or indirect effect on our present and future’s hope. The regret, pain and sorrow that often succeed wrong or wrong actions are often serious. There are things we do in life that may throw generations of many of our descendants into long living problems.



Mistake is a common word explaining a wrong action or event someone ignorantly or wilfully plunged into. All men are liable to making mistakes, mostly sponsored by ignorance and bad habits. Mistakes are either minor or major. Certain laws are expected to govern our activities and actions in all areas of our lives; a violation will engrave their effects.



He that breaks the hedge, the snake will bite him. Ecclesiastes 10:8.

According to Eden’s experience, there are actions and activities that expose and invite strangers. Mistakes could be breaking the fences of protection and life by this are expose to threatening situation.

Although, men are not perfect, but wrong actions will have cumulative regrets and sorrow. An entire life of an individual is like plain pages bounded into a booklet. We are expected to write with pens of actions and decisions. Wrong actions are cancellations. Many of these on individual pages make such life uninspiring, unattractive and full of regrets

In life, we may have to learn some important lessons by first experiencing the bad sides. Not all experiences are gathered in this manner. Many a times, we are privileged with the choice of knowing and doing the right things before jumping into wrong. There are specimens of stories from lives of men and women at different ages, stages and places that we can learn from: Bible is such a wonderful book to learn from lives of people. Thanks to many authors who boldly put their failures and successes into the print.



If all the bad sides of life are known before lesson is learnt, it will be “late” before these are heaped. By then, it will be irrelevant bones in the grave. Other will have to learn from such foolishness displayed while on earth.If mistakes are made now as did sometimes ago in a particular area of life, it is a sign that vital lessons have not been learnt. It will be a disaster, if such people are entrusted with responsibilities in the area they are yet to identify the obstacles and how to conquer. To confront some challenges with this incompetence will present these people and many in their surrounding cheap prey in life. Most especially in that area of weakness and ignorance!



Human errors are sometimes unavoidable, but when this had turned to habit, it will give birth to major mistakes. This is an automatic invitation to pains.

Everyone do make mistakes. I have personally made some that I wish should not. However, my great consolation had been in the mercy and love of God. Human errors are inevitable, but many mistakes are sincerely unnecessary if we had considered some simple rules carefully. Seek and secure wisdom and apply appropriately in all our endeavours.



Although, you may not be responsible for making some mistakes, but it is your responsibility to deal with those that feast on your peace and happiness. Those that turn your gain to pains, grace to grass and glory to groaning must be stopped. Providing solution is rewarding and worthy of commendation. Labouring under the pains of regret is however not necessary. All that is needed is to change course and follow the enduring mercy of God that has all power to reorder your life for the better.



It is important to seek and secure wisdom for living a quality life full of testimonies. Unfortunately, we do not have the pre-understanding and privileges to rehearse this life; yet quality living is demanded from us. We have only one life. Our lives have tendency to become a reference point in the future.



SELF EVALUATION

•Have you ever made mistakes before?

•Can you outline them

•How often are they made?

•Which of these mistakes cause you fear, affect your joy and peace

•Can you identify effect of this mistakes in your life, family and others areas?

•How are you dealing or intending to deal with them?

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Chapter Two

EXPLOIT OF WRONG



A Man hurriedly sold his precious land because he thought the gold there was exhausted only to that the new owner had discovered on the same land a large reservoir of gold in about 3m where the first owner stopped his anticipation. It was painful but not his any longer-, what a mistake!



Mistakes are things we ignorantly or carelessly do wrong. They are wrong ideas, conceptions, beliefs and ways of life we yield our precious heart. Mistakes are right decisions carried out wrongly or right ideas, belief and ways of life wrongly applied. Mistake is ignorantly walking in wrong road, heading wrong direction, belong to wrong group, attempt a wrong course or a right course, wrongly. Mistakes can be ignorant or careless violation of instituted laws, standards and procedures. They may be immediately or afterwards visited with painful outcome. Although, mistakes (Major) are ignorantly or carelessly committed, their effects are not in sympathy with any one’s ignorance or negligence.



Pains of Mistakes Regrets



Regrets, pains, sorrow, losses and limitations are possible fruits harvested from the trees of wrong.

Regret is one of the greatest pains of mistakes. It may need divine hand of mercy to tame it. If consistent in it obligation, it can gradually weakens the bones. What should have been done either by you or others but was not, can kill every seed of motivation. This can launch its victim into the queue beside the best. Alongside with regrets are pains, sorrow and discouragement.



Regret is as common as air. Hardly can a day Passover without someone regretting an action or a choice . This shows how often mistakes are made!



If an individual life is replayed over, there are actions he or she would have loved had not been taken: a friend he or she had not moved with or should have, a place he or she had not gone or places he or she should have or items he or she had not bought or wish he had bought.



Sometimes ago, I heard an old man regretting his many decisions and actions in life. He thought of working harder at his old age to meet up the pressure of the demands. At such old age, he had many children to train; a great burden to him. He was only performing the duties given him by the so-called “Fun” he called enjoyment then. His tastes had enslaved him. I once knew a girl who had her education interrupted till date because she was impregnated while in the secondary school. Many women had offered their bodies as a ransom to consolidate their claimed love to many beast-men. This had not favoured their ignorant counsel; they were jilted as well as dejected for playing life’s game foolishly.



Many students had wished they had studied their courses/subjects when the time gap for their examination was much. Some students engaged in examination malpractices and were dismissed from the institution. By this, some had their educational dream ended. These opportunities were wasted and are now re-attempting what they are conveniently capable of doing just once. Many children had wished they listened to their parents, guardians or counselors whose ways of life was thought to be in the pattern of the old and their counsels were termed “Old school”.



I have heard several songs of regret from many couples. They are both regretting marrying each other because the angel he or she married is now a classical devil. They regretted plain the tune on the fast lane they could have soft-pedaled impatience and follow the rule of order.



I once heard an old man, an errand-gate man with a meager pay boasting about the good old days. According to him, he was blessed with money and opportunities and the economy of Nigeria was buoyant according to him. I was curious about what happened. After that, I stayed close to him that I learned much from his past. His life story was similar to many of the old people I have seen in his category. Most of them had spent their precious resources on non-developmental projects. Some had wasted their physical strength, youthful days, resources and time on ladies and harlots. They engaged in frivolous livings and activities developing many grace, glory and gains sapping habits and ventures. They are now better good at running errands and shifting blames on people an.



If your good days are in the past, you are limited by mistakes you did not know or you know, and have not corrected or you are still constantly committing!



When I was in the second year in the university, To the best of understanding, read well and discovered a book commonly used by one of my lecturers for his course in the library. I saw some exercises similar to those in the lecture note. These I copied with their solutions. I gave them to my friends; fortunately, two of these exercises were part of the examination questions.

I was to work out set of eight answers and one led to another. I missed the first and second questions out of three. I was disturbed; I failed this course and had to re-register the course again. Being a three units course, it affected the cumulative grade points. This took time to build up again.

I failed before the examination because:

(1)I was fearful and nervous.

(2)I was only hard-working and not diligent.(Read more about this from “Wisdom of the Ants)

(3) My priorities were not set right then.

(4)I had assumption in my knowledge acquisition.

(5)I thought I had mastered the questions, solution and the course well; courtesy overconfidence.



Making mistake continuously do have cumulative effect. The overall pains are not sympathetic. There are reactions to most actions. They are lubricated by passive and active instituted laws, standards and accepted norms. There are pains linked to violation of any rules and regulations. Uncorrected mistakes are sources and monitors of pains and sorrows.



•Constantly making mistakes will always encourage limitations in your life

•Journeys may be prolonged unnecessarily because of constantly made mistakes.

•Mistakes may open doors of frustration except if quickly corrected.

•Mistakes are the cancellation we effect on plain and clean pages of our life while we write by the pen of various activities, actions and decision. The more these mistakes, the more uninspiring and unattractive a life is.

•The value of your life, wealth, power and influence is reduced by how continuously you make mistakes.

•Effects of mistakes are contagious; they affect not only you but others close or distant people also.

•Mistakes can cause untimely end to a promising anticipation, gift, skill, career and life.

•Continuously made mistakes will dilute potential and reduce exploit and efficiency.



Categories of Mistakes

Mistakes can be categorised first based on the extent of their effect into minor and major mistakes. According to their areas: physical Academic, Professional, Marital, Managerial and Spiritual mistakes. All these are areas where mistakes are possible.



Minor mistakes (human error): does not have noticeable effect. Some of these may be negligible but their build-up will surely make great impart capable of sinking a fellow into the ocean of regrets. Minor mistakes may be overlooked if not often committed: like sleeping above schedule, arriving late to a place of programme (depending).

Kicking one’s feet against stone or mistakenly drop pen, book, breakables, keys, or picking a wrong key to start your car, or open your house, office. These minor errors do have little effect. However, when they had turned habits, their cumulative effect will cause painful effects somewhere, somehow and some day; and you will not love the situation then!

Major mistakes may be in duration of few seconds or minutes, but they can mar testimonies, brake-hope and shatter potency. They are always from provocation of ignorance, pride, fear, anger, and impatience. These easily multiply the effects. Major mistakes are triggered and encouraged by bad habits indulged in over a period. Irrespective of the time, they effects enduring pains, sorrow and limitations.



SELF EVALUATION

•Briefly state your regrets?

•Match these with mistakes causing them.

•Identify any constantly made mistake

•What efforts are you making to be free from the claws of these mistakes?

•Can you identify common human error continuously committed by you?

•Do you have any bad habits?

•Identify their roles.

•How do you deal with them?

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Chapter Three

SOURCES OF MISTAKES



It may be difficult to completely prevent making mistakes. This is because there are many sources of mistakes: you, your partners or friends, neighbours, parent, relatives (family members) and leaders. All men and women are potential sources of mistakes. And it depends on their degrees of ignorance and carelessness about the truth and rules and regulations which govern a particular endeavour or people, bad habits and relationship with God and men.


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